Back stabbery, bitchiness and jealousy

I have never understood the competitiveness and jealousy BS with females. The back stabbing and bitchiness. The constant comparing. To be honest, I have never been one to partake in gossip and bitching and have always thought it was childish, school girl behaviour.

Why do women feel the need to compare ones self to other females? Why do women feel threatened by another female? Petty jealousy is beyond my comprehension. This behaviour isn’t just relegated to one area either… it is extensive. From looks, work, cars, houses, partners, mothering, even children and now the big one, BLOGGING.

You see it has come to my attention a few people have been talking behind my back, normally I would ignore such petty crap but this time they are questioning my work ethic and it has really dug under my skin. To say I’m not happy about it would be an understatement.

I have been working as a business, marketing, emarketing and social media consultant for the last 15 years and qualified with business degrees in both marketing and ecommerce.
I have also been blogging since the start of 2009…. Yes, four years. At times it has been sporadic due to work and family commitments but I have still posted at least once a week. So, yes I have been around a while and yes, I kind of do know what I am doing.

I have also been on Facebook for 7 years and Twitter for 4 years. Hence, my high numbers of followers/ likers. I don’t need to buy followers or likers, I damn well earned them by using my marketing skills and social media smarts. I have tweeted over 53,000 times and because of this (and using key words to gain followers), I have over 20, 000 followers.

In the old days, you always followed anyone who followed you. Now it is all about the quality of who you follow. Prospective clients or employers now check to see who you follow to get a better understanding of who you are as a person. So this is why I only follow back 4,000 out of the 22,000 followers of my account.

Yes, I get paid to blog, as do a lot of other bloggers. So what? Each to their own, right? If you don’t want to get paid for blogging, that’s your prerogative but it is also my prerogative to make a living from mine.
It really peeves me no end when hearing bloggers jump on the bandwagon and complain about who gets paid, who doesn’t, who has a lot of followers/ likers, who doesn’t.
I’m guessing this is where the whole ‘disclosure’ BS has come from as well. Not because of ethical standards of blogging but for other bloggers to be nosey and from a need to know how many paid posts you do or what you received for doing it.
Guess what? Who cares!! Do print media disclose what they get gifted, paid for or events they are asked to attend? Erm nooo! (note: sarcasm indicated in last paragraph)

My theory is: As long as you are happy with what you are doing, then it really isn’t anyone else’s business. Is it?

So essentially, unless you know me and know my past or experience, don’t bitch about myself or anyone else for that matter.
If you have an issue with what I do or with something I have written, there are numerous ways of contacting me via the contact page on the blog. Or maybe just get a life really….

18 Comments

  • Kimmi @ The Plastic Diaries

    I am sorry to hear you have been having a rough time in this area. I obviously know how much you have dealt with in the short time I have known you and it seems so stupid that people would be bitching about you in a blogging sense. I would like to think beauty bloggers aren’t as “bad” as it would seem mummy bloggers are but to be honest, I think it is just kept a lot quieter. I think every blogging circle has a group of petty people who can’t handle the success of others. It upsets me greatly because there is no industry that needs to support each other ,ore than blogging.

  • Darren Rowse

    Hey Kellie – I completely agree with the need for us online folk to work towards a less bitchy/competative making approach online. Each of us should focus upon what we’re doing and creating something useful.

    However while I was reading your post I was thinking how it’d be simple for you to prove you didn’t buy followers and that it came from hard work as you say above – and I flicked your Twitter account into TwitterCounter.com and http://fakers.statuspeople.com/ to get you the stats to use to back up your post here and I do see a strange set of results.

    Last September your Twitter account jumped up by almost 20,000 (from 7k to 26k) in the month and the Status People tool shows you having 86% fake followers.

    On some levels I guess it isn’t anybody’s business but on the other hand these stats are pretty easy to check and being built into a lot of mainstream tools these days and perhaps that’s where some of this chatter comes from?

    • Kellie Anderson

      Hi Darren,

      I think anywhere where you have a group of women, it tends to get bitchy and competitive. Just the way it is unfortunately.

      To clarify your point, I DID indeed work my arse off for my followers. In Aug, Sep and Nov last year I pushed my social media on all levels. Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Linkedin etc. As you probably know, if you list your Twitter handle on

    • Darren Rowse

      Not suggesting you did anything untoward – just thought you should know what those tools show.

      For eg. the http://twittercounter.com/StylishKellie show's a big upswing for September – almost 500 followers a day when previously it'd been 100 or so and then it stopped really suddenly and declined.

      I'm sure there are explanations and it's none of my biz –

    • Kellie Anderson

      As I said… it could have been from my social media push.

      I tend not to believe everything I read. How do we know these pages are legit and not spamming sites or similar?

  • Stephanie Anderson

    oh well done I do hate gossipy crap… hurrah you stood up for you..
    and the last para… yep gossipers are behind you for a reason… you stand out in front… usually those peeps are nameless faceless anonymouses… who dont blog or care about the feelings of those that do…
    good for you… well done
    keep doing what you want to… (from a first time commenter of yours long time

  • Anonymous

    40% fake…. Lucky you signed up all those advertisers beforehand

    • Kellie Anderson

      Excuse me? You obviously don't have any idea how Twitter works because I can guarantee everyone has fake or spam followers!
      My advertisers are with me for page numbers and what I can offer them… not my Twitter numbers.

      Oh and next time you want to comment, how about having the balls to actually use your real name! Gutless keyboard warrior!

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